Brain: Remember that time you sneezed and farted at the same time in front of that girl you liked?

You may choose, but choose wisely. For if you don’t, you’ll walk out with 300$ worth of stuff.

I’m no expert but I do believe that if a scientist accidentally falls in, they will become Neutrino Man.

I’ve tried to read the full terms of service before and on top of being very long, they’re overly vague when it comes to what they collect.

This is why I always bring two dinosaur grabbers. One for me cock, and one for the door.

Nice outfit you put on me. It would be a shame if I were to TURBO POOP MY PANTS.

Sniffles porn: Two vivacious nostrils ready to be stuffed with thick gunk

To think I would have gone to the grave without seeing this.

NO ONE GETS IN. NO ONE GETS OUT.

“Big coat…little coat…hmmm…it’s a big issue so we need the big coat.”

Me: I can’t wait to-
Some dude: Hey our lord is mad at the lord from the other hill, so grab a pitchfork and join our army…or else.

Never pass on pp fun times…unless it’s not your thing then absolutely pass on pp times.

Tequila: Listen man. You can dance.

If you’ve ever played dwarf fortress you will know.

There’s a Venn diagram between marines, furries, and rappers. They all tend to bark during songs.

I once bought 5 McDoubles, just because I could. Those days are gone.

Just a little!