You could also try losing a leg. Those are pretty heavy.

This idea brought to you by ChatGPT

Buddy, she’s breaking up with you. Accept it.

I’m not gonna lie here… as someone who lives in a country that requires photo ID when voting, I am more upset with the fact that you guys don’t have a national ID of some kind that is issued for free to everyone regardless of whether they can drive or not. This is a preexisting vulnerability that he’s exploiting.

EDIT: “In most cases, you will need either a driver’s license or a state ID to register to vote. If you do not have either of these, you may be able to provide other types of documentation, including a bank statement or utility bill. But the required documents you need to register vary by state. Check with your state’s election office to find out what documentation they accept.”

I see some states may have made an attempt at it? Also, how does a utility bill or a bank statement prove your citizenship in the US? Are they getting information about your citizenship from your bank? I assume non-citizens are allowed to open a bank account, right?

If I’m woefully uninformed, please disregard.

Nothing should be. Grams are so much easier. Imperial units feel like trying to do math while on mushrooms. When I find a recipe in imperial units I just quit lol

I’m not real

I’m a figment of your imagination

He did the Riyadh Comedy Festival. He was judged especially hard since his dad was a 9/11 victim

Jane Wickline has singlehandedly breathed new life into SNL for me. Previously it was Pete Davidson (RIP his career choices) that made me feel represented there. Made me excited to watch.

Bang bang! Feuer frei!

When my dog is a little hoarse I take him to the vet

It’s too small to measure, just like his…

The original poster still thinks “Italians aren’t white”

You know what’s funny? Cadette doesn’t let me pet her, but she lets me boop her nose. I understand that’s how cats say hello. So I guess that’s her way of saying hello to me

Also, please come back later and tell us what a cat’s nose tastes like

I think he’s all they have left lol

What… the actual… fuck

No, it’s cool. The flames cancel out the ice. The resulting sensation is actually quite pleasant

DHS! DHS, over here! Oh! Oh! DHS! Look here! DHS! Down here, DHS! Look here! No, not there! Here, look at me! Are you looking?

Fuck you.

I find your comment insulting. I dare you to try saying that in my group.

I’m defo never gonna be allowed into the US. Ever.

Good.

Means I’m less likely to get shot. Ever.

Copying my videos from my phone to my external harddrives as I type this